I’m sure you’ve heard people tell you it’s not selfish to take time for you or you can’t pour from an empty cup … we hear phrases like this often when your a mom and if I’m being honest when people told me this in my head I’m thinking yes ok it’s easy for you to say you’re not living my life you don’t understand… or I would say I literally have no free time so how can I take time for myself.
I think so often we have it modeled to us that we need to be going from sun up to sun down… that we need to be pouring into our kids, our husbands and our home and after all that there’s nothing left for ourselves… so we tell ourselves I have no choice but to continue to pour from what little we have left in our cups.
Well I can speak from both sides … I was that mom that didn’t even stop to breath … I was literally drained 24/7 and kept trudging though life because I convinced myself this is the way it has to be I have no other choice… especially as a mom of littles who need you all the time.
I will say in those newborn/ toddler years it is hard … they don’t sleep … if your breastfeeding you’re their on demand milk service and young kiddos just want their mommas. My youngest especially we teased she was my little sloth.. she was clung to me 24/7. So I know what it’s like trying to even go to the bathroom alone feels impossible!!! So yes I will say you may not get more than a few min to have some “me time”, but I also want to say… try to look for opportunities… if baby is napping lay down for 20 min or sit and read a couple pages from a book. When hubby is home from work ask if he can help out at home so you can run some errands or grab yourself a coffee or go for a walk around the block to get away for a bit. When the kids go to bed take time for yourself first to do something you enjoy and then go to the tasks on your to do list you wanted to get done at night. Seeking opportunities in our days to rest or do something we enjoy is so important… I promise you afterward you will feel reenergized.. refreshed and more motivated to tackle the tasks of your day.
For me those opportunities for my “me time” would change … at some phases in life I wouldn’t get to do anything until the kids were in bed and then I would spend 20-30 min reading my Bible or I would work out or some times just lay on the floor and decompress from the day😂 Sometimes nap time was my little slice of heaven during the day .
In this phase we’re in now my kids are still early risers but now they are old enough I can get them situated with something to keep them entertained so I can do my Bible study … or a quick workout in and hopefully not get interrupted during that time … they are getting better after some time they have come to understand my routine and why mommy needs time alone to care for my self mentally .. physically and spiritually.
As my kids have gotten older and I can have more conversations with them that they comprehend. I found it incredibly helpful to not only model these practices to my children but explaining to them what I’m doing and why I do these things so they understand the importance and allow me to have that time to work on myself but also understand these daily habits are important to live a healthy life.
What I’ve learned in this journey going from burned out momma to a mom who has learned it’s ok to take time for myself is when we don’t take time for us we can fall into this pattern of just going through the motions of mom life .. feeling drained.. hopeless and not as joyful as we envisioned feeling as a mom .
So a few tips to think about….
*Set dedicated fun times ( which is self care ) and ask yourself what is going to fill your cup !??
Is it a walk .. reading .. Bible study .. dancing .. painting .. Learning a new hobby .. sitting in nature .. journaling
once you know what it is that fills your cup .. then decide when in you day will be your designated “me time” where you take time away to do something for yourself.
I do my “ me time” right away in the morning in this life phase so I fit it in and don’t make excuses why I can’t do it because I know that time for myself is valuable.
*For moms of young kids – schedule naps .. dinner and bedtime and then work your day and to do list around those since they are your daily priorities or markers for the days flow … with this schedule in place then it will become more clear on when you can find time for yourself…even if it’s only 15-20 min.
🍃I’ve become very passionate on this topic so be sure to follow this blog because I’ll be sharing more on this subject in the future! When we make time for ourselves we are taking a step towards living a simpler more mindful mom-life.
Ok mommas let’s hear when in your day will you take time to fill your cup ?
